Only Hate the Road When You're Missing Home

I have this theory, that as long as your level of homesickness does not overtake your experience for too long, you are okay with being here. This goes wrong when tragedy, trauma, or other miscellaneous "negative" events keep happening for an extended period of time. Sometimes it's just normal wear and tear that can keep us homesick for a long period of time. I think that is when people chose to go home or not to stay.

When I talk to my students about resiliency, I use the analogy of throwing a rock in the ocean; it can be a big rock that makes one big wave or it can be several small rocks that continue to make the waves larger. Resiliency is our ability to ride the waves and settle back to normal. Peace Corps, in and of itself, is a trying experience for the best of us. It will bring up everything you've ever hidden away in your mind and test you more than anything other experience in your life. Service in the Peace Corps is not always white, sandy beaches and picturesque resorts... some days, it is extraordinarily difficult to get through one day. And this is 100% normal.

Cycle of Vulnerability- Peace Corps

Shown above is the diagram about the cycle of vulnerability and statistically, the volunteers in my group should be at our lowest point in service. Typically, the hardest things to deal with are the issues that come from home. Current volunteers are unique because we live several lives. We have our "USA Life" (our past), "Peace Corps Volunteers Life" (how we interact with other volunteers), and "Village Life" (who we are at our sites). Think of these are three separate venn diagram circles that make us who we are. Life continues on in each circle separately, but with the ease in ability to stay in touch across long distances, we have to somehow manage all three concurrently.

But, you "only hate the road when you're missing home." Yes, I am missing things at home and I am constantly homesick; but, you learn to cope. You learn to value your other volunteers and keep your American traditions alive. I love the fact that some of the closest volunteers to me are from Missouri (see the picture below of Katie, a close PCV who has also lived in the show me state). They get it when I talk about Ted Drews and Imos. Every time I hear a song that I heard back home, it triggers a memory and the same is true with meals. I keep in contact with my friends and family via Whatsapp, Facebook and Skype.

Katie and I enjoying some icecream. 

It is hard to watch people change. It is hard to watch people get married and have kids. It is hard to watch people change jobs. It is hard to miss out on holidays. However, I have a feeling they would say the same about me. You have to have faith that the experience, which fate has brought you to will be worth it and will outweigh the homesickness. Those who mean the most to you, will find a way to keep in contact (even if they hate technology). At the end of the day, it is only two years. Most children don't remember things prior to around age 3 or 4 anyways. Nothing I have missed, is worth missing this experience. Have faith. Trust. Stay true to yourself. You will only regret the chances you haven't taken. Most of the time, it's worth it. Sometimes, I look back on the hardest days and realize that now those days are reasons to stay. It is worth it. Life goes on. You'll catch up when you get home. You'll realize that all those little details you missed aren't nearly as important as the person themself. And that what truly matters.

It is the people- not the experiences you are missing that are truly important. 

(The title name is from "Let Her Go" by Passenger)